EDIT: I should have paid better attention but Matthew wrote a post right below this one that you should go read. It is much more informative than reading about mascots. Here is the link if you don’t like to scroll.
The first week of Pac-12 play brought a few exciting games, a bad loss, and mostly predictability. This week, we get our first conference game, a slew of uninteresting non-conference games and hopefully some awesome mascots! Now, for your second installment of 2013…. Let’s get to the mascot post!
Until we get in to full-on conference play, I will simply just pit each game’s mascot against each other in a fight. Using a very scientific method, I will determine which one will win and I’d recommend (if you’re the betting type) placing your money on that team. We all know that the tougher mascot determines the better football team. I’m sorry if I don’t like your school’s mascot. I’m not actually.
Sacramento State Hornets vs. Arizona State Sun Devils – Thursday 10 P.M.
So, some people think bees/hornets are fairly evil. My wife visibly gets flustered and sometimes lets out a scream when a hornet or bee gets near her. She’s not alone in that. Now, how do you think she would do if the devil came near her? Now, this isn’t a contest to see what is the most intimidating thing but intimidation is built on fear. Do you think the devil would be afraid of a hornet? Not a chance. If the hornet is even capable of having fear, it probably wouldn’t enjoy being around the devil. Hornets are a formidable, annoying thing but they ran into one of the toughest battles out there. Sun Devils flick the Hornets aside.
Weber State Wildcats vs. Utah Utes – Saturday 11 A.M.
YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING! MORE FREAKING WILDCATS?! Last week brought two teams with this wimpy mascot and so does this week. A wildcat is slightly more terrifying than a house cat. It’s not terrifying at all. Ban the Wildcat! Ban the Wildcat! The Utes were a Native American tribe that is well-respected. The Ute skins the Wildcat alive and then cooks it over a fire while receiving nothing more than a scratch.
Oregon Ducks vs. Virginia Cavaliers – Saturday 12:30 P.M.
What a ridiculous match-up. Let’s turn to our friend, Dictionary.com to help us sort this out.